My story begins where society tells us a Woman’s life ends…at age 40. Don’t get me wrong, my life prior to turning 40 wasn’t so bad. I had achieved many of my childhood goals—I became a trial attorney, started a business, had a son, bought a home and won a couple of cool awards. Despite all this, as I reflected upon my last 40 years, I was still somewhat dispirited.
If you’re over 40, or even 30 for that matter, you’ve probably experienced the dreaded LIFE REVIEW. I’d heard about this life review, from my girlfriends and older sister (yup, had to throw in the fact that’s she’s older…Hi Mer!). At 30, I was way too busy to go through a life crisis. And, I figured turning 40 would be no different! Ask anyone; for at least 2 years, I eagerly awaited turning the big 4-0. I had visions of a tattered book of golden wisdom, raining down from the heavens upon me (preferably the book was autographed by Oprah and came delivered in a red Birkin)! But alas, no book, no Birkin. Instead, I sat and cried, feeling I had accomplished absolutely nothing in my 40 years on Earth (really I laid in bed crying, but saying ‘sat’ doesn’t make me look like the basket case I really was).
You may be thinking: What about the law degree, the business, the kid…? Well, the expensively framed Georgetown Law degree still laid in the corner of my home office, which was exactly where the movers placed it the year before. I stopped practicing law just before opening my business, a college-prep school for kids growing up in a neglected part of NYC. However, that business subsequently closed, leaving me emotionally bruised and disillusioned. As for the son I birthed…sadly, he became a teenager (just kidding Myles). But seriously, let’s just say he’s well past the age where he greets me at the door every evening with a warm, fuzzy hug. And those awards…well, they’re scattered between never opened boxes, seldom dusted shelves and occasionally glanced at walls. This was hardly the 40 I had envisioned.
So, what next? I’d never been one for sitting around feeling sorry for myself…at least not for too long (I’ll spare you the details of the week where I oscillated between Soul searching, crying and drinking). Since my birthday is in December, I shifted my attention to writing my goals for the New Year, a habit I started in my mid-30s. But, this time I dug with a deeper sense of purpose. Having painstakingly looked back at the past, I emerged from my pity-party intent on charting a course for a more authentic life.
In law school, I learned the art of taking one subject, like say…Constitutional Law, and studying it for a full year. I decided to apply that principle to my life (hey, maybe I can dust off that law degree after all). Instead of half-heartedly aiming for a ton of accomplishments that would later prove unfulfilling, I decided to focus my attention on a singleminded goal--or case, if you will.
My goal…(drum roll please)…Weight-loss and Wellness: My journey to figure out what it really takes to successfully release excess Weight and achieve overall Wellness.
I decided to keep an online journal to keep my older sis (yup, I did it again), who moved to the other side of the world, up to date on my progress. Then, one day it occurred to me that I should keep the journal public so any other interested Woman could also benefit from the lessons I learn along the way (my son jokes that my site will have 2 visitors: my sis and I…gotta "love" that supportive teenage humor).
So, from one 40year old mid-life crisis, Womanism was born.
I hope you enjoy my journey & join the community.